From Mom:

Mother’s Day, Bishopric message May 8, 1977

By Gail S. Halvorsen, bishop

The thought expressed by Theodore Curtis that, “Motherhood is the noblest peak in the mountain range of character,” often reminds me of my Boy Scout days and one particular scout trip that was not in the mountains. It was a jamboree on the big lawn just north of the Hotel Utah (1933) and a long way from our home in Rigby, Idaho.

For several months Mother had been putting small change away for a pair of new shoes. The shoes were set aside at the local store until she could save enough money to pay cash. I remember her keen anticipation as her savings grew to almost three dollars.

She reached the three dollar goal the same week the scout master rode by on his horse to tell the folks about the jamboree in Salt Lake. I had already told him and the troop I couldn’t go. My time was completely taken helping Dad on the farm and there was just no money available for special or regular jobs during those difficult times. Mom knew how much that trip meant to me and signaled Dad to reassure the scout master that I could go. After he left I asked Dad where the money could come from and all he said was, “Don’t worry.”

The next day as I hurried off with the troop Mom pressed a small manila envelope into my hand. I will never forget that trip because when I got back home Mom still had on her old shoes, but a special light shone in her eyes. I am sure that light was there when I was born, and I saw it each time after that when she gave of her time and strength to do something special that made us happy, and it was also there when we did things to make her proud of our actions. I can only describe it as an expression of complete joy. It had the brightness of a piece of the star that shone over Bethlehem on the special night the Savior was born.

We warmly exchanged greetings and then I fully realized that my trip had taken the place of Mom’s new shoes. I had wondered where the three dollars for the trip had come from, but my selfishness kept me from admitting it must have come from my mother’s shoe fund until that moment when I realized she was still in her old shoes.

I have seen that light shine for similar reasons from the eyes of the wonderful mother of our children and from the eyes of mothers of this ward.

Let us as husbands, sons, daughters, brothers and sisters so live that our example will more often cause this special mothers’ light to shine because of our good works, and thereby express our gratitude to her for our very presence on this planet earth and the key part she plays in the Lord’s eternal plan.

That we may do this as members of the Oak Hills First Ward in Zion, not only at this time but throughout the year, for those mothers present and those beyond the veil I pray in the name of our Lord and Savior, Amen.

Gail S. Halvorsen

Bishop

Chapter 9: Berlin

What would it be like to go to 4 parties in one night? What about having 3 parties a week at your house for a bunch of adults? How about being driven around the city in a fancy car by a driver? Or living in a big house with two maids to help clean it? Would you feel like a movie star or some other famous person? Well, this is how life was for the four years that Grandma and Grandpa Halvorsen lived in Berlin. Grandpa was the commander at Tempelhof Air Base and they were expected to go to lots of dinners and parties, and in return, invite people to their home. They refused to serve alcohol in their home and instead served fruit punch or apple cider. This was a very big deal because everyone else expected to drink alcohol at these functions. In fact, Grandma and Grandpa said they didn't think they would be kept there for long because of their principles. Grandma said, "W don't care if we are sent home, we won't compromise our beliefs." Some people were grateful for Grandma and Grandpa's choice, and others criticized them for it. However most people admired them and loved Grandma for her warm, genuine personality as well as the exceptional food she prepared, and as it turned out, they stayed in Berlin at Tempelhof for 4 years--longer than any previous commander! This was an intense balancing time for Grandma--to support Grandpa in all these busy events, to fulfill her calling in the church, and to be the mother for her children at home. She was also expected to be in 5 different clubs, 3 of which she had to be on the board for for 4 years. She managed to do it all, although she said it was difficult. Towards the end of their stay in Berlin, she also was diagnosed with cancer, although her children didn't know it at the time. She kept in touch with her parents through letters, and supported her children who were away--Brad on a mission and Nana at school. To discuss: One of Grandma and Grandpa's greatest critics was a Mormon from Utah. He said that they shouldn't refuse to serve liquor their house in Berlin. Why did they stick to their guns on this principle? What did it teach their children? Grandma said in a letter to her parents how strange it was for "two people from the sticks" (meaning herself and Grandpa) to be in such a position of fame and acclaim. What was it about Grandma and Grandpa that attracted people to them? How can we apply this in our lives?

Chapter 8: Santa Maria, California (1968-1970)

When Nana was in high school, her family moved again! At first she was upset with her parents for moving, but she quickly forgave them when she saw how much fun California was. Also, she was given a horse, which she loved to ride with Grandpa and Aunt Marilyn. One night, she even got to go for a moonlight ride on the beach with Grandpa! These were big years the family. Uncle Brad finished high school, left for BYU and got his mission call. Nana also finished high school--the last three months she lived with friends while the rest of the family left to Germany. Aunt Marilyn was involved with student government, band, and ballet. Grandma encouraged her children to try out for things at school. Uncle Brad gave a speech to try out for a student body office and he accidentally ended it like a talk in Church, and that was funny to the whole family. But he won! He said that Grandma's encouragement really helped him in these last years at home before he left for school and a mission. Grandma wrote to her parents that she now understood how hard it really was to have kids leave home. Through all the changes, Grandma was her children's constant. Nana described her as being "like a rock in a moving river--steady and true." When changes came to her life and her kids' lives, she provided the sameness. She loved to celebrate big occasions, and she and Grandpa made sure they kept up the traditions for the family from year to year. To Discuss: When changes come into your life, what are some ways to cope with them? How can we help others deal with change?

Chapter 7:  Mt. Vernon, Virginia  1965-1968

  After three adventure filled years in Europe it was time for the Halvorsen Family to load up and move back to the United States.  Grandpa received an assignment working in the Pentagon, which is headquarters for the Armed Forces of the US.  Grandpa talked about not looking forward to this assignment because of all the politics that are involved at the Pentagon but true to their nature, the family made this into an exciting adventure and great time of life. 

One fun story from this time is about Nana Bean getting ready for a talent show.  Grandma Alta wrote about this, "They (Nana and her friends) decided to sing and they have spent three weeks changing their name, deciding what they wanted for a costume, buying the material and pattern and getting go-go boots to go with it."  Nana even cut one of the girls hair for the performance.  Then she washed and styled all the girls hair.

One thing Grandpa Hal mentioned was a possible plan to teach in Colorado after retiring.  They were always busy making plans for the family but ultimately left it in the Lords hands where they would go and what they would do.  How can we exercise our faith in the Lord leading us where He needs us?  How has He lead you and your family?

This is where they bought a canoe.  A lot of time was spent camping, fishing, and rowing around in the canoe.  They made sure to attend the museums and monuments around the capital.  The kids all became involved in seminary, the ward, Nana was asked to be the pianist in church even though she was just a teenager.  The boys did scouts, teens did youth activities, they filled their lives with wholesome activities and friends.  

This was also a period of change, Grandpa Hal was promoted to Colonel,  Grandma Luella Halvorsen passed away, Uncle Brad started High School, Uncle Bob was baptized, and everyone was growing and changing.  Grandma Alta seemed to be the glue that held everyone together.  She had the kids practice their instruments, do jobs around the house, be responsible for their school work, and keep busy learning new things.  How can having responsibilities help kids to learn and grow?  What do you do around the house to help the family?    

The European Assignment--Chapter Six

When Nana was just 10 years old, she got to live in Germany for 3 years!  This was one of the most enjoyable times for everyone.  Uncle Mike was born just one month after they arrived there.  Grandpa had a top secret job that he couldn't talk much about because he was a little bit like a spy for the government, checking out what other countries were doing with their space programs.  He was very busy, and received a promotion.  Grandma said in one of her letters that maybe he should have stuck with being a regular "Indian" and let someone else be the "Chief"--meaning that he was super busy because he was in charge of so many people.  However, he had chosen this assignment over another one in which he might have been made General but wouldn't have seen his family much.  Grandpa and Grandma always chose to spend as much time with their family as they possibly could.  They loved to go on vacations together, and one of the first things they did when they got settled was to sit down and plan 3 years of vacations together all over Europe and the Holy Land (Israel) so they could see it all while they were so close.  And they really did it!  Their children got a real education as they traveled all over and saw many different ways of living and many different countries.  Would you be nervous traveling around in countries where you didn't speak the language?  Grandma was very brave and didn't seem to be worried about that at all.

The kids loved living in Germany.  They had a neat house with a spiral staircase going up the middle of it, and it had about 4 or 5 stories!  There was a wonderful garden out back of one of their houses with a cherry tree, and there were lots of woods and fun places to explore.  They got to bike down to buy bread and candy from nearby stores and Nana even got to ride the bus by herself to her piano lessons!  Grandma kept the kids busy with chores and practicing, and she taught them how to sew and crochet and knit as well.  She took them to many cultural events, and she and Grandpa taught them all how to ski.  Once the president of the United States, President Kennedy, came to Germany.  Grandma took all the kids down to see him but there was such a huge crowd they couldn't get a look.  Adults were on top of other adults' shoulders!

Do you ever try to get out of doing your chores?  Well, one day when Uncle Bob was supposed to be doing the dishes, he snuck out and went to play in the woods instead.  While out there, he fell and hurt himself.  Grandma doctored him up and then gently reminded him that if he were doing what he was supposed to, he wouldn't have gotten hurt.  She then encouraged him to finish doing the dishes.  Grandma helped the kids learn that a job worth doing is worth doing well, and you should be diligent in the things you are asked/supposed to do.

To Discuss:
When Grandpa and Grandma knew they were going to Europe, they took that opportunity to plan many trips and experience as much of the world as they could.  Why is it important to look for opportunities to learn and grow from the world around us?  How would their experience have been different if they just stayed in their town in Germany for three years and didn't explore elsewhere?
Grandma and Grandpa taught their kids to work hard and develop skills in life.  Why is this important to do?

Chapter 5:  San Pedro, California (1958-1962)

"Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities."  The Family--A Proclamation to the World

Did you know that Grandpa was in the Space Program?  Grandpa was transferred to the Space Systems Division of the Air Force to do research and development.  The family was transferred to the West Coast after living in Ohio and Alabama.  This job required Grandpa Halvorsen to be gone from the family a lot.  To make up for this the family planned a lot of vacations to camp, ski, and visit grandparents.  

The family discovered some favorite camping spots during this time.  They camped, hiked, and fished in Yosemite, Mammoth, Kings Canyon, CA, and Zion National Park.  They traveled to Carson City to visit Grandparents and even lived there for a few months after leaving San Pedro before moving to Germany. They took time out of their busy lives to build the relationships that mattered most.  How can you become a better friend to your brother or sister?  When was the last time you told your grandparents that you love them?

Grandma Alta had a lot of responsibility with being the Primary President, raising 4 kids (Uncle Mike wasn't born yet), and helping friends and neighbors.  Yet she always found time to be a support for each child.  Uncle Brad called her his "best friend" and commented about how she gave him "tremendous encouragement and support".  She encouraged her kids to try new things, lovingly drove them from activity to activity, and even let her kids choose for themselves whether they would attend church activities.  This helped them commit and gain testimonies for themselves.  

Grandma was a courageous woman as we have been learning.  She had to place herself in new and unfamiliar experiences often as she moved the family around the world.  In California she even learned some plumbing when the pipes needed to be drained and Grandpa was away.  How do you feel when you have to try something new?  It is scary but you can learn and grow from that experience.

Some Discussion Ideas:

What makes our family relationships so important?  What can we do to strengthen our own family?  What are some activities you like to do with your family?  Is there a day this week that you can do one of those activities as a family?  Here are some fun things we like to do:  Caleb learning a new skill:), Attending a dance and award assembly with Grandpa Halvorsen, playing at home with Nana's blocks, going to the beach, here we are with Aunt Lucy in San Clemente.

Grandma Alta Chapter 4--wife, mother, Air Force life

Setting up house after their marriage, Grandma expressed excitement with simple things.  Like her washing machine and toaster.  She even offered to do her family's laundry for them if they would send it to her!
She did a lot of typing to help Grandpa get through two degrees in record time.  He said she earned the degrees with him, and that he could never have done it without her help.  Even though they were very busy, they took time for fun (golfing, deep sea fishing together, having visits with friends).  They made do with very few things.  She told a funny story about having friends over and it was really dark in the living room because they didn't have any lamps in there.  She said that would be their next project.
She wrote a cute letter to her family announcing her first pregnancy.  She told her parents she couldn't wait to give them their Christmas present, and they could choose boy or girl, it might be either.  15 lb weight gain was all the doctor wanted her to gain!!!  She was sorry to not be able to eat fruit--especially the watermelons in Florida.  
Military moving--Grandma said moving was hard as the kids got older and had to move away from their friends, but that it really brought the family closer together.  They made lots of friends, and saw a lot of the world.
She did talk a bit about the stress of inviting important people over, but she got over it when she realized that people are people no matter how rich and important, and she soon found her groove with all the hostessing she had to do.
Tired mother story--the same things happening in 1950s as now--Aunt Marilyn drawing on walls, getting a bad burn, climbing up on everything, being picky eater, too busy to spend enough time with everyone.
It was very sweet to read the story in Grandma's words of the traumatic burn experience.  She felt so sorry because she felt she had been too busy doing too many things--trying to iron while feed people lunch and look after the kids.  She also expressed during this time that she felt Brad didn't get the attention he needed during grade 1.  She said that they did their best but it seemed that they didn't do enough.  Sometimes as parents we just can't be everywhere and do everything we need/want to, but all we can do is our best!  It was interesting to read Brad's comment that he felt his mom was always there for him when he needed her and that she helped him with moving transitions and new schools.  So it seems that our efforts are noticed and felt by our children even if they don't have the ability to express that to us.

To Discuss:  At different stages of their lives Grandma had to get by with very little money.  She always expressed gratitude for what she had, and she was very inventive in meeting the needs of their family.  She also had a great sense of humor in describing her changing situation.  In what ways can a sense of gratitude and humor be a blessing in our lives?  Grandma also found that she just needed to be herself when in the company of rich and important people.  How can that lesson she learned help us to do the things we will be asked to do in our lives?